Accepting Reality & Managing Expectations

Updated: Dec 6, 2018

"Energy Flows Where Attention Goes."

Sometimes our (unrealistic) expectations get in the way of being satisfied with life. Here are some questions you can ask yourself to manage expectations in difficult situations, and accept reality for what it is:

-Is there anything positive or constructive I can do about this?

-What were the events that caused this to happen in the first place (facts, not assumptions)? How could this be avoided in the future?

-How important is this, really?

-What higher good could come from this?

-What lesson(s) can I learn from this?

-What in this experience can I find gratitude for? (Hint: It might be only that you had the strength to get through it, but there is always something.)

-Remind yourself that everything tends to work out in the end.

-Remind yourself that the only person over whom you have control is you.

-Why did someone else behave the way they did? Find compassion for their point of view.

-What could I have done differently?

-Will this matter in 5 years?

-Will my expectations change the way someone else behaves?

-Why is having things my way important?

-What was I thinking when a negative emotion arose?

-Am I suffering from a cognitive distortion? (Identify, label, keep asking yourself, “why?” until you find it, then combat with logic.)

-Remind yourself that, “Energy flows where attention goes.”