Laura met this guy named Bill. He was such an awesome guy! He held the door open for her, was kind to everyone, treated her like a queen, had a great job, worked hard, and even put his dirty clothes into the hamper. Amazing, right? Wrong. They were divorced within two years. What went wrong?
Their values were different. He didn’t want kids, and Laura thought having children was important. He valued nose-to-the-grindstone hard work - and was at the office all the time. Laura felt that her relationships were more important than her work.
Just because someone seems like Mr. Right doesn’t mean they are for you. At the very least, your values should be symbiotic, or complementary, if not the same. (For example, Bill may not have found kids to be high on his agenda, but if respecting his partner’s dreams was, things may still have worked out.)
Here are 4 reasons you and your partner should have similar values and life goals:
You’ll fight less. If the same things are important to you both, you’ll have less disagreements. Laura and Bill wouldn’t have battled over the time he spent at the office.
You won’t have any nasty surprises later. If Bill and Laura had talked about whether or not they wanted children (and how many), a lot of sadness and grief could have been avoided.
You will have to give less up in compromises. Laura and Bill might have been able to make things work with compromises, but each felt their values and goals were too important to them to let them go.
If you and your partner have similar values, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts, deal with challenges, and work toward common goals.
Do you have a well-defined set of values? What do you think your purpose in life is? What are your long-term goals? By identifying and honoring these, we increase the chances we’ll find the perfect partner for us.
Everyone has a different perspective in life, and you can learn how to use yours to attract the perfect partner for you, and leave the losers, jerks and Mama’s Boys behind.
Grab a Perfect Partner Assessment to learn your top three roadblocks to finding the perfect partner, and the #1 strategy you can use to get on track. Click here to get yours: