You didn’t know you had a target on your back, did you?
What is it that the losers, jerks, psychic vampires, and Mama’s boys look for when they’re out on the prowl? How can we avoid them?
What we put out into the world (even unknowingly!) affects what we attract. I call it “The New Car Factor.” When we get a new car, suddenly we notice all the other ones just like it out on the road. That model is now familiar to us. In the same way, those jerks, losers, and psychic vampires can recognize traits in us that make us an appealing target. So what are those things?
Our self-esteem and self-confidence is too low. In the same way that bullies find the weak, psychic vampires and losers find the needy. Take the time to create positive self-talk and practice self-care. You can’t pour water from an empty jug! Be confident that you can handle anything. Because you can.
We’re wary because we’ve been hurt before. So often our ego gets beaten up during a divorce. We’re made to feel like we’re greedy or crazy. It’s almost like we’ve been thrown into a blender, isn’t it? Psychic vampires see this and play the pity game. “Wow, that’s so awful!” they’ll tell you - making you think they’re going to protect you. They know you’re bruised - and they’ll take advantage of that bruise every time.
We don’t have a defined value system. When we take the time to not only nail down our values, but make sure our behavior and attitudes reflect them, we won’t be “love chameleons,” changing the way we feel to suit our partner, or a “desperate hunter,” settling for the first guy we find. Losers, jerks, and psychic vampires can smell that a mile away!
We’re “looking for love in all the wrong places.” Where do you go to meet guys? Do you go to bars and clubs? Prowl the supermarket? Have your friends set you up? Flirt with all the cute guys in the office? Instead, focus on meeting guys organically. Participate in activities you love. Go places you find interesting. This is where the men who have similar interests to yours will be hiding.
These are just a few of the messages we send, not even realizing it! If you’d like to see what the top messages are that you’re sending out, and the #1 way to send good messages to your perfect partner, grab a Perfect Partner Assessment. We’ll discover what keeps you from finding your perfect partner, and the #1 thing you can do to find him! Click here to schedule yours: